Switch: How to Change Things When Change is Hard

I read  Switch: How to Change Things When Change Is Hard  last month, and have wished for time to write about it nearly every day.

I found the book transformative in so many ways.  I do enjoy reading books about personal productivity; but it is rare when I can take away more than a few nuggets of good information to apply to family life and running a busy household.

Switch really goes beyond the typical business-y productivity book.  Almost every page brings new ways of looking at situations and relationships.  Wow!

Greatest take-away points:

            *small changes can  make a huge difference

*self-control is finite

*the notion of “pre-deciding” to do something makes it far more likelier to happen

The three sections of the book correspond to different elements of decision-making:  Directing the The Rider (or self-control), Motivating the Elephant (the emotions or passions), and Shaping the Path (or controlling the environment so good outcomes are easier).

I can think of so many ways I want to implement this in so many areas:

Direct the Rider (self-control, which is finite, the authors point out again and again):

Find the bright spots:  this is about finding positives and focusing on them instead of dwelling on the negative.  I think this has particularly powerful applications in relationships.  A good example of this is trying to distract from or ignore most negative behavior, not as a cop-out but as a way to “starve” them of attention.  Then, pointing out the positive behavior in myself (I ran 10 miles!) and others (you brought the books in from the van without anyone asking you! I like that!) promotes a better family culture.  This is hard for me because I am so verbal, so not only does the positive get highlighted but the negative.  I find it easier as I get older to be quiet for the negative.

Script the critical moves:  As a planner, I LOVE this concept, but the way they describe it as “pre-deciding” to do something is powerful, and really a new way to look at it, especially for the non-planners among us.  For instance, I can say, oh, I want to clean out my closet, but scheduling it (even in my head) for Saturday morning before going out makes it much more likely to happen.  It takes the decision point away from the moment of, “Oh, it’s Saturday morning, what should I do?”

Point to the Destination:  I also love this concept.  The authors point out people should provide big goals for ourselves and those around us, helping to set a tone for excellence.  In the book, the authors describe a teacher who kept telling her low-performing first grade students, “at the end of the year, you’ll be second-graders.”  Then she provided specific  ways to help turn them into second-graders, and she succeeded.

Motivate the Elephant: (the emotions and passions)

Find the feeling: This is using emotions to motivate the elephant to get started on a project or change goal.  Instead of a powerpoint or a  technical article, a visual of the impact of a bad decision can be much more powerful.

Shrink the Change: Breaking things into baby steps makes the bigger jobs more likely to be completed.  I loved that they quoted Flylady’s mantra of “you can do anything for 15 minutes (I think they actually used the five minute rule, but her timers say, “Just 15 minutes” and I’m amazed at how that has changed so many of my projects.

Grow Your People: this is providing time and space for people to daydream and brainstorm solutions to challenges.  I think home education is well-suited to this, providing ample opportunity to come up with good ideas to challenges or new ways of doing things. The problem for me sometimes is holding (kids in this case) accountable for putting the good ideas into practice, even temporarily.

Shape the Path: (controlling the environment to make good outcomes more likely)

Tweak the Environment: The classic example given in the book is that people eat less when eating off smaller plates or out of smaller containers.  It doesn’t seem possible something so small can have such a big difference, but it can in a range of circumstances.  I am mulling ways I can change our environment to make it easier for kids to keep tidy and pick up after themselves without mom extremely verbal voice! Hmm.

Build Habits: By having a habit of virtue and of doing the good, it makes it easier to keep doing it.  This is also shows the importance of family rituals that become second nature, like family dinners and certain traditions. 

Rally the Herd:  Group psychology can help people do the good better than one-on-one.  Here’s something of a disadvantage to home education.